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3.7.5 The Tying of the Wedding Thāli

The main symbol of marriage for Hindus and St. Thomas Christians is
the tying of Thāli by the bridegroom around the neck of the bride, so much
so that marriage in Malayalam is called Kettuka, which means tying (the
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Thāli). The bride stands at the left side of the groom. The priest blesses the
Thāli and entrusts it to the groom, who ties it around the neck of the bride.
3.7.5.1 Theological Significance

By tying the Thāli around the neck of the bride, the bridegroom
unites his wife to himself. He offers his pledge of love by the gesture of
tying the Thāli and declares her to be his wife. The couple give great
spiritual significance to the Thāli. Once the husband ties the Thāli around
her neck, the wife wears it till death. Among the St. Thomas Christians, this
is a symbol of the strong bond and intimate union between the spouses.

3.7.6 Singing the Syriac Hymn Barmaryam (the Son of Mary)

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Barmaryam is an ancient hymn of blessing that is sung by the
priest at the end of the marriage celebration (usually at the end of Mass) in
the church. This is an exclusive characteristic of the Knānite wedding. This
hymn, which is sung by the Chaldeans on festive occasions, is about the life
of Christ, with specific mention of the marriage at Cana where Christ did his
first miracle, and of the crucifixion where the Church was betrothed to
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Christ. Among Chaldeans, even today this hymn is sung during the
celebrations of Easter and Christmas. Among the Knānites, this is used to
bless the newly-wedded couple with the divine grace of the Son of the

56 Thāli is a small heart-shaped gold ornament that the bridegroom ties around the neck of
the bride.
57 Ibid., p. 34.

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According to Jacob Vellian, this hymn is seen in a book (Manuel de piete) published in
Paris in 1886, pages 375, 573, 876. This book contains ancient liturgical songs among the
Babylonians which were collected and published by a Chaldean named Byjan (?). In this
book Barmaryam is found in the third part where the prayers and songs, to be known for
the sacristans can be found. Cf. P. U. LUKAS, Malayālatte Suriyāni Kristyānikalute
th
Purātanappāttukal (Ancient songs of the Syrian Christians of Malayalam, 1910), 7
Edition, Jyothi Book House, Kottayam, 1992, p. 217.
59 Cf. VELLIAN, J., “Marriage Customs of the Kinanites”, in J. VELLIAN (ed.), Crown,
Veil, Cross, Syrian Church Series Vol. XV, Kottayam, 1990, p. 35.

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