Page 14 - Microsoft Word - My story of Pathyil Kalluvelil as told by Joseph Pathyil

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the grand father of Thommy.

As the years went by, Kochokan mellowed, and became an affectionate grandfather.
Mary (Sr. Nicholas), his eldest granddaughter remembers how Kochokan was the
personification of affection. As a child she snuggled next to the grandfather. She was the
one who had to bring him warm kanji-water at night. Luka, the son of Abraham, was with
him when Kochokan planted the Mango sapling (Ngettukuzhiyan mango tree) and told
him to send him a ripe mango to heaven, as he would not be around to enjoy the fruit on
earth. Thommy’s second son Luka was born in Neendoor. The grandparents wanted him
in Pathyil. When the baby was eleven months old, Kochokan and Ilachi went to
Neendoor by boat with a boiled egg to entice the child, brought him to Kaipuzha.

Kochokan very much wanted to control the finances and fortunes of the family. But as
the boys grew to be young men, he had to let go of much of the authority. Traditionally,
the youngest son would stay in the ancestral house, while the other sons would be settled
in the lands belonging to the family. Uthup was sent to Kalluvelil, which Kochokan had
acquired, from some Ezhavas. But he found Kunjittiavira to be a handful, and rather
unmanageable. Therefore, one fine day, he packed Naithy (Kunjittiavira’s wife) and
children in a boat and sent them over to Kalluvelil and recalled Uthup to the ancestral
Pathyil house. When Kunjittiavira returned from Kidangore where he was teaching, he
was peremptorily told to join his family in Kalluvelil. Such was the abruptness of
Kochokan.

Kochokan died on November 5, 1923.He had been a shrewd and careful farmer. He
bought lands and fields extensively. Before his death, he partitioned the properties to his
three sons. He divided the properties into three and asked Thommy to choose first. He
chose the ponnengine and some of the fields. Uthup took some properties and gold.
Kunjittiavira had the rest including a piece of land in Kurumulloor (which nobody
wanted). The sons were not easy to please. Much disagreement and dispute arose as to
who would look after their mother. Whoever was going to look after her was to
administer Kaipuzha-Kari, which was kept aside for her. In the end, Uthup affirmed that
he would look after Ilachi and that he would not ask for compensation for that. Instead he
asked the field (Kari) to be given to him and he would compensate his brothers in
installments. The field was worth Rs.900/ and Uthup paid off his brothers gradually.
There were tensions as a result of the partition, which took a long time to heal. As the
debates about partition was heating up in the drawing room of the Pathyil household, one
of the children was heard crying in the courtyard. Abraham came out of the room, saw his
wife trying to soothe the child. He went up to her and slapped her across the face. Naithy
remembered it to her dying day, as that was perhaps the first of the very few occasions
when she was physically abused- and through no fault of hers.

Ilachi died on February 11, 1928. The last few years of her life were spent in the loving
company of her children and grandchildren. Her children and daughters-in law loved her.
Her life was selflessly dedicated to the cause of her husband and children. As her
daughters in law were preparing the body for burial in law, they were horrified to see the
burn-mark on her back. She had suffered and endured much.

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